Why Married Couples Should Travel Together sans Kids

Jul 8, 2018 | Marriage

My husband and I have been together for almost nine years, boyfriend-girlfriend stage included. In those years, for some reason, we don’t travel that much. I mean we do, but destinations include places we can only travel by car. The farthest we went to was Batangas, when we had to attend a wedding, and Baguio – with kids in tow . We were supposed to go to Palawan way back 2010, but I was rushed to the hospital the night before, so we said goodbye to Coron on that very night. Responsibilities came early as well, so any plans of travelling were postponed. 

Would you believe, it was only last June when we first had our first out-of-the-country trip together? I really cannot contain my excitement because for starters, we’re going to Japan and second, it was the first time for us to travel with NO KIDS. 

I had to admit, though, that guilt was toying with my emotions. I really wanted the kids to come, but the selfish momma in me was telling my mind that it’s okay because the husband and I needed a break as well. My parents took over and watched the kids while we were away, so there’s nothing to worry about. Plus, we deserve this, don’t you think? 

Travelling with the husband with no kids was a breath of fresh air for both of us. Don’t get me wrong. I love my kids and would move mountains for them, but there’s pleasure and satisfaction in being able to drink coffee while it’s hot, caring less about the laundry, and not hearing little voices and arguing about who’s prettier. For the first time, I wasn’t in a rush when taking a bath and I can eat breakfast in peace. I get to talk to my husband with no tiny humans saying “Excuse me” because they need to show their drawings. 

This leads me to my next point: to all the married couples out there, take time to travel with your spouse with no kids around. 

Here’s why:

Everyone deserves a break. 

Why Couples Should Travel without Kids

At Yoyogi Park

Let’s be honest here. We love our kids, but there are instances when we just need to take a break and enjoy some peace and quiet. Being able to travel with the husband gave us that much needed break from work, kids, and other responsibilities. We’re not machines. We get tired too. 

Travelling makes up for the “time lost.” Vacation without KidsWe live together in one house and under one roof, but somehow, distractions get in the way. There are instances when the husband was eager to tell something, but kids would constantly interrupt or one of the girls is sick. There are times when I want to stay up late and have a decent conversation with him, only to find out that he’s sleeping soundly already. Travelling sans kids allowed us to reconnect and made up for the time when we chose to sleep first, or attend to the kids’ needs, or finish work. Since we’re all adults here, the “make up for the time lost” includes intimacy as well. 

It strengthens the relationship. 

Why Parents Should Vacation without Kids

Tokyo National Museum

Going on a vacation with the husband allowed us to focus on each other. Oftentimes although unintentionally, my husband takes a step or two down the priority list because other equally important responsibilities get in the way. When we travelled, it’s just the two of us and no one else. Travelling enabled us to reconnect and prioritize each other more, which helped strengthened our relationship further. 

Create new memories as husband and wife. Vacationing without KidsYes, we are parents to two beautiful girls, but we are also husband and wife first. We love filling our girls’ Memory Bank, but we also loved the fact that the husband and I were able to try something new and add something memorable on our own list. Being married is not just about being parents to our kids but also fulfilling our roles as husband and wife. Married couples should never forget that. Plus, don’t you think it’s fun to reminisce about what happened many years ago? 

Ready to pig out in Tsukiji Market

We promised to go back to Japan and with the kids for sure, but I don’t feel sorry for taking that trip with the husband alone. The trip reminded us the importance of prioritizing our marriage as well because without a healthy marriage, there wouldn’t be healthy parents and healthy kids growing up in a healthy, harmonious household – and we don’t want that. 

24 Comments

  1. Michi

    I miss traveling with my husband, iba pa rin yung couple travel. But I’m a paranoid mom so kahit gusto ko hindi ko maiwan sa iba anak ko. Siguro pag teenager na baka pwede na. hehehe!

    Reply
    • Karen

      We can’t travel far enough coz the kids are still young plus we don’t have nanny na. However, still make time to have dinner date or go to the mall without the kids at times naman.

      Reply
      • Ayi

        That’s good to know. Dinner dates matter šŸ™‚

        Reply
  2. Juvy

    I agree to this! You should continue exploring life as couples even if you already have children. I am lucky since, my mom lives with us and I can leave my boys with her, whenever me and my husband go out. Couples time alone does your family good, as it strenthens your love and bond for each other which actually benefits your family. Dont feel guilty leaving your kids behind.

    Reply
    • Leira

      When my husband and I were still together we used to do this JUNK (Just us no kids) trip it definitely strengthened our relationship.

      Reply
  3. Charley's Mommy

    Super agree to this, Mommy! Roommate and I travel once in a while without Charleybear just to have some “us” time.

    Reply
  4. mhea macabenta

    Agree! I hope to do that too with my husband, but even sneak-out dates can give us the break we deserve too.

    Reply
  5. Edel San

    I feel guilty upon reading this post. You see, as much as I want to travel with the hubby, he is so not into it. Ang trip nya is date-date sa coffeeshop or art gallery. Hopefully will get to that when the daughter goes off to the university.

    Reply
    • Ayi

      That’s fine momma, as long as you spend time together. Yun naman ang important, diba? šŸ™‚

      Reply
  6. Nicole Reyes

    Awww. Agree to that! But somehow mom guilt nangingibabaw pag maiiwan ang kids esp pag baby pa. But couple time is much needed to be refresh and replenish through alone time of you together. Oh how I miss it. I think we need that too.

    Reply
  7. Eve

    I agree with you, our marriage should be our priority (before our kids) and we still need to go out on a date. Travelling out-of-the-country with the spouse is one of our #marriagegoals.

    Reply
  8. momi berlin

    I agree. But then there will always be this guilt that you left your kids under the care of others. and when you saw something, you will always remember your kids and say “gusto to ni ganito…” but then i agree. We also need alone time with our spouse

    Reply
    • Ayi

      Hahaha. That’s how I was. When we went to Tokyo, our luggage was full of stuff for kids and sila lang din iniisip namin most of the time.

      Reply
  9. Czjai

    Since we have only one child, medyo nakaka-guilty na hindi siya isama sa travel. Siguro pag teenager na ang anak namin gagawin rin namin ito hehe. šŸ™‚

    Reply
  10. Lani Banzon

    Like everyone else, I agree that we need time to travel alone as couple with no kids around. It strengthens relationship and we also need to relax and enjoy each other’s company just like when we were just bf/gf. However, I’m guilty that I can’t do it and leave the kids at home. Di ko kaya iwan sa iba kids ko. I guess we can just have a date somewhere near and travel together (just the 2 of us) pag malaki na mga anak namin. šŸ™‚

    Reply
  11. Mommy Anna

    We randomly have a date para we can spend time alone together, as far as I remember nakaalis lng kami ng matagal during our marriage encounter for three days. Hope we can do this too soon

    Reply
  12. Maria Teresa Figuerres

    This is something we haven’t done since we became parents to our unico hijo. We always travel together as a family. It might take a while before the husband and I can do this because for sure, I will miss my teenage son if he won’t be with us during our vacations.

    Reply
    • Ayi

      Wait till he gets older pa. Baka ayaw na sumama the next time.

      Reply
  13. Mommy Ruby

    I would love to frequently travel with my kids or sometimes go solo. But as a single mom, it gets quite busy and my time is mostly split up in working and attending to the kids.

    Reply
  14. Peachy @ The Peach Kitchen

    Waaah, this is something that hubby and I should do. Hindi kami nakakaalis ng wala ang kids. We miss them too much.

    Reply
  15. Mumwrites

    The most we have done so far is go out on dates on our own. Hopefully, we can also try taking a vacation without our little man, and sans mum-guilt, too.

    Reply
    • Ayi

      Yes, we have to get past that mom guilt. I know how you feel but at the end of the day, we are also wives, right? šŸ™‚

      Reply
  16. tweenselmom

    It’s crazy with my husband, we don’t get far or even overnight together, because he worries more for our daughters more than I do. But I always think that he is sweet that way.

    Reply
  17. Emiliana

    Couple travel adventures reinforces the love they have for each other.

    Reply

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I am a law student turned stay-at-home mom to two beautiful girls. Join me as I go through this journey called momma-hood. [email protected]

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