10 Things I Learned and Experienced from Having a Second Child
I want to have three kids. Hopefully, two boys and a girl. Of course, I was blessed otherwise. I have two girls and yet to have a boy. However, I didn’t plan a close age gap between my girls. My husband and I’s plan was after giving birth to my eldest, I’ll finish law school first then have baby number two. In the middle of the term and before A turned one, I found out I was two months pregnant.
To cut the story short, A and J have an age gap of 1.5 years. To be honest, I have so many questions, fears and worries about raising two kids. I was amazed by how my parents raised us and treated us equally (I have three younger siblings) and wondered if I could do the same. Unfortunately, there is no rule book or manual that helped me prepare on how to handle a second child.
2. It can be overwhelming. It takes me forever before I finish packing the baby bag. My husband always tells me, “Ang tagal niyo” as soon as we get inside the car. Leaving one kid unsupervised is also a big no-no. My day won’t be complete without crying fest, pretend play and lots of shouting. Of course, things get easier now that they are a bit bigger.
3. A jam-packed schedule. It’s all about play classes, doctor’s appointment and everything about the kids.
4. Master the art of dealing with different sets of needs. I have my fair share of funny and chaotic stories with having two kids in the house. There are days when my kids decide to be on their best behavior. Most of the time, it’s just full of crying, screaming and laughing. I also experienced one child telling me she has to go potty while I’m breastfeeding. Or I’m putting my youngest to sleep and my eldest asking me to put her diaper. There is even a battle between Frozen and Tangled. Oh, you get the picture.
5. Synchronized naps in the afternoon are once in a lifetime. Seriously. At least I mastered putting my kids to sleep – both at the same time at night.
6. It can be hard to find a nanny. Finding a nanny these days is hard. Imagine if there are two (or more) kids in the house. Before I hire someone, I always inform them of my kids’ ages and what they could expect. If they’re up for it, then I’m happy. Problem solved. Otherwise, I have to move on to the next – just in case there is.
(I had an experience where a yaya stayed with us for less than 24 hours. Hindi niya daw kaya ang two kids.)
7. “When will you have baby number three?” Seriously, I always get this. Since I have two girls, people always asks me when I plan to get pregnant again, hoping it would be a baby boy (or if in your case, people will ask if you’re done because you already have a boy and a girl). Come on. I want to enjoy my kids first. Yes, I want a baby boy but not now.
8. Double the happiness, double the fun. Watching them play together, hearing them laugh together and seeing my eldest being protective to her little sister makes my heart melt. Their laugh is one of the sweetest sounds in the world. I just love seeing my kids grow close to each other. Yes, it can be a chaos inside the house and the never-ending chore of picking up toys and putting it back in the toy box will always be there. At the end of the day, there’s too much happiness to be shared with having more kids.
9. You know better. This is what I like about having a second child. I know better. Parenting books and childbirth classes helped me prepare but I have no idea what will happen after giving birth to my eldest. I was clueless in everything. With my second child, everything was a breeze and much, much easier. In fact, changing diapers, burping and bath time didn’t scare me anymore.
10. There’s so much love to give. I never thought I could love so much when I my second child was born. I was even scared if I could give the same love and attention to little J. When she was born, I realized that my heart got bigger and I am capable of giving love more than I thought I could. I think that’s what being a mom is all about.